This wasn’t the path I chose. I didn’t want any of this. Yet this is the path God allowed for me.
In my office hangs a beautiful picture with the words from Proverbs 3:6
In all thy ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct thy paths.
Tormenting, confusing decisions. Sorting through Satan’s lies and God’s truth. Praying for wisdom. Seeking guidance and direction.
And after a few weeks, in the silence, after the pleading, the path was clear. Not the path I chose or wanted, but the path God allowed for me.
Thankful today for God being my trail blazer, my compass, my guide through the storms of life; thankful for His promise of directing my path and making it straight before me.
“If I were your enemy, I’d magnify your fears, making them appear insurmountable, intimidating you with enough worries until avoiding them becomes your driving motivation. I would use anxiety to cripple you, to paralyze you, leaving youindecisive, clinging to safety and sameness, always on the defensive because of what might happen. When you hear the word faith, all I’d want you to hear is unnecessary risk.” Priscilla Shirer in Fervent
This is exactly where I’d been…crippled, paralyzed, indecisive, concerned about what might happen, clinging to safety and sameness.
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In reading this chapter of Fervent, Priscilla also shares that fear is one of Satan’s greatest ways in crippling God’s people. I’d also been focusing on fear not being from God.
So I began to think, “If Satan is working this hard to keep me in fear and not moving forward, what amazing beauty and/or blessing from God is he trying to keep me from?”
My prayer for Confronting Fear:
God, I thank You that You don’t give me a spirit of fear but of power, love, sound mind. I ask You to forgive me when I give in to fear and ask that You help me not to choose, wallow in, entertain, or make friends with fear. You promise me a hope and a future. Because fear doesn’t come from You, help me recognize Satan’s attacks to keep me from Your plan which is my destiny-my next challenge/opportunity to see Your glory on display in what You wish to do with my life. You are fearless Lord-please give me the faith to be fearless in You.
When I’m afraid, help me choose to put my trust in God whose word I praise. Instruct and teach me in the way I should go, Lord-counsel me with Your eye upon me. Give me Your peace, not as the world gives. Take away the fear that I allow to cripple me for I know that if Satan’s working overtime to make me fearful, there must be some blessing or beauty from Heaven He’s trying to divert me from. Thank you in advance for that blessing and beauty and for Your work in my life! In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.
Many of us may struggle with doubts and questions to God. The Psalms are so comforting to me as I find my prayer journal entries looking so much like the Psalmists’ writings.
God desires us to be real with Him. Yet He also desires us to cling to His promises. This was my prayer to God as I struggled through my counseling that dealt with believing in God’s restoration.
Have you ever struggled with some of these thoughts? Regardless of our situations, God desires us to cling to His promises. He is Faithful!
God, it’s not that I don’t know that You’re all powerful, that You desire all to come to repentance, that You’re greater than this…I know that all in my head. I’m struggling to believe this in my heart for my situation. So often the bondage of sin seems so great and yet You already conquered sin and death! I’m struggling as You’ve given us all a free will to choose…and yet You’re Sovereign and know what will happen…and I struggle that I don’t. I’m struggling with accepting the fact that my loved one may never choose You or to be healed and that You may not choose to intervene.
God, at times, I’ve sounded as if I’m demanding You to heal him and our situation, please forgive me for that Lord. You have a plan-You promise to prosper and not to harm me-to give me a hope and a future. Give me the faith to believe Your promises to me.
I’ve asked You many questions this week. What if You choose not to fix my brokenness? What if no matter how much I pray for my loved one and our situation, the answer is no? What do You want from me? What are You doing with my life? How do I know Your will? How/What does Your joy look like in my life? How do I respond to people when they ask how I am? How can I glorify You in the midst of my pain and sadness?
Through the week Lord, You’ve shown me that You want me to be a better broken-my situation may never get better-Your will may not involve my loved one or our situation to be healed/restored….it’s not for me to worry about. Instead, You’re teaching me that You want me to get better in my brokenness-to know You with an intimacy and genuineness I’ve never-before experienced. To completely trust You with each day and footpath instead of focusing on hiking the tallest peak of the mountains in my life. To not hide in my circumstances but be ready to share genuinely how You’re working in my life without having to talk about my loved one. To embrace the reality I’ve been given now-I can daily pray for him each morning but also look to You to help me embrace where You have me right now.
I haven’t been able to experience full joy because I’ve been so focused on You fixing my situation. Yet You desire me to glorify You in my brokenness. Please, Lord, help me as I continue on this journey, in this process. Have Your will and way in my life, my loved one’s life, and in our situation. I love You and thank You for how You’re already working that I can’t see and for how You will work. I pray this all in Jesus’ name. AMEN!
…I’ve said this numerous times in my life…or “Dear Lord Jesus” or “Dear God”…an opening to prayer. A familiar greeting such as an opening to a letter.
What I realized one day as I reflected on who my God is to me…I’m addressing God as I would in a letter…it’s just an opening greeting.
Even though my prayers often begin with thankfulness to God for who He is…I wasn’t thinking about who I was addressing in my opening line-just saying the words.
This really took me back and I spent a week reflecting on this…to think about the relationship God desires with me as His child.
It’s taking practice. What I’m doing is taking a moment before opening in prayer to reflect on who God is to me…what God means to me…the fact that He’s right there with me in that moment and always…and then I begin to pray with the renewed head and heart knowledge of who I am talking to instead of addressing God like the opening of a letter.
At a red light. I sat in the car and thought about my situation.
Finding myself frustrated with my loved one, I chose to talk to God about it. Sharing my frustrations that the situation doesn’t seem to change or go anywhere helped me refocus on my part.
And in the stillness what I heard,
How much have you prayed today for him?
Thank you Lord for pointing me back to what’s most important! I can’t change my situation. I can’t change my loved one. I can pursue him in prayer and allow You to work in Your time. Thankful today for the refocusing of my thoughts and the truth that prayer releases frustration and my Heavenly resources to work where I can’t.
betterbroken 